Big personality here who is happily married– ALWAYS BE YOU! If you find the right person, they will not just allow you to be you, but WANT you to be yourself. I’m sorry that your mother is not in the same place as you are mentally. That I believe in the power of yet shirt, she is an adult, and what she does have control over is herself. Always be there for her, but don’t feel like you need to “rescue” her. She is an adult who makes her own choices and likely finds meaning in those choices. Just be sure to offer a safe place for her if she ever wants to leave or talk.
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You living the happy life she also deserves is the best thing you can do for her. Find that person who makes you happy and treats you *amazingly*, live a life of I believe in the power of yet shirt and meaning and maybe with time she’ll come to realize she doesn’t have to live the way she’s been brainwashed to believe she has to… It’s an incredibly tough situation but you sound like you know what you need to do. Find your happiness, peace, joy, truth and love and spread it on to others. Ultimately that’s all we can do in this life.